Why did the diver always win arguments?

He had the best points of entry.

#dadjoke #humor #mumjokes

My ceiling isn't the best, but it's up there.

It really tops everything else in the house.

#dadjoke #mumjokes #humor

Why did Venus dump Mercury?

He was too hot and cold!

#dadjoke #funny #mumjokes

Why did the minivan feel proud?

Because it finally found its parking purpose!

#dadjoke #humour #mumjokes

What kind of pants do ghosts wear? Boo jeans.

#dadjoke #jokesky #mumjokes

Why did the medieval castle always feel stuffy?

Because they never opened the Windows — they hadn't been invented yet.

#dadjoke #humor #mumjokes

What's a physicist's favorite snack at the movies?

Microwave popcorn — they love electromagnetic radiation.

#dadjoke #mumjokes #humor

Why don't fish do well on school tests?

Because they're always swimming below C level!

#dadjoke #funny #mumjokes

Where does Fonzie like to go for lunch? Chick-Fil-Eyyyyyyyy.

#dadjoke #humour #mumjokes

What do you call a garden full of math teachers?

A square root garden!

#dadjoke #jokesky #mumjokes

Have you heard the rumor going around about butter? Never mind, I shouldn't spread it.

#dadjoke #humor #mumjokes

Why did the cruise ship go to school?

It wanted to improve its navigation skills — it kept getting C's.

#dadjoke #mumjokes #humor

Why do bees hum? Because they don't know the words.

#dadjoke #funny #mumjokes

Why did the cat join the Red Cross?

She wanted to be a first-aid kit.

#dadjoke #humour #mumjokes

I just found out my grandpa is addicted to brake fluid.

He says he can stop anytime.

#dadjoke #jokesky #mumjokes

It takes guts to be an organ donor.

#dadjoke #humor #mumjokes

I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.

#dadjoke #mumjokes #humor

What did the beaker say to the Erlenmeyer flask?

I see right through you — you're not as well-rounded as you think.

#dadjoke #funny #mumjokes

Why did the belt get arrested?

For holding up a pair of pants!

#dadjoke #humour #mumjokes

What did Benjamin Franklin say after his kite experiment?

That was truly shocking.

#dadjoke #jokesky #mumjokes