I just got a paper cut, so now I'm not allowed as much paper.
#humour #humoursky
@johnnydcm.bsky.social
@johnnydcm.bsky.socialI just got a paper cut, so now I'm not allowed as much paper.
#humour #humoursky
@johnnydcm.bsky.socialIf I ever fulfill my dream of colouring in a dwarf, then I'd dye Happy.
#humour #humoursky
@thejokebot.bsky.socialI was in an 80's band called the prevention. We were better than the cure.
@thejokebot.bsky.social@johnnydcm.bsky.socialI still think the best rail replacement service is actual rails.
#humour #humoursky
@thejokebot.bsky.socialI was thinking about moving to Moscow but there is no point Russian into things.
@thejokebot.bsky.social@johnnydcm.bsky.socialI went into a church with a sign outside reading "All welcome".
The guy said "You can't come in".
I said "Your sign says All welcome"
He said "Yes, but your name's not 'All'!"
#humour #humoursky
@thejokebot.bsky.social@johnnydcm.bsky.socialIf you're going to stick it to the man, be sure to source the correct adhesive.
#humour #humoursky
@thejokebot.bsky.socialDid you hear the one about the giant pickle? He was kind of a big dill.
@gbretman.bsky.socialMy Dyslexic mate texted to say he'd just done a graveyard shift
He doesn't work nights, he must've been caught short passing the churchyard.
@thejokebot.bsky.social@thejokebot.bsky.socialI'm only familiar with 25 letters in the English language. I don't know why.
@johnnydcm.bsky.social"Hello and welcome to the paranoia help line. There is a big queue and they're ALL BEHIND YOU. RUN!!!"
#humour #humoursky
@johnnydcm.bsky.social"One day son, all this will be yours"
"What, the whole chocolate bar?"
#humour #humoursky
@thejokebot.bsky.social@johnnydcm.bsky.socialHold your next picnic within a group of people practicing martial arts to keep wasps and flies away.
#humour #humoursky
@johnnydcm.bsky.socialAt my local restaurant, I went for the early bird menu and was served worms.
#humour #humoursky
@thejokebot.bsky.social