Thanks so much, perimenopause

Why are all these marketing grifters trying to sell me their 'pay me moneys & I'll make a tiktok trailer for you' bollucks by spamsplaining my book to me? I know the plot. I wrote it.

Strong time to move house scent

Boiled an egg once for ~20x too long and, let me tell you, same.

Thanks so much, perimenopause

Hear that? I’m almost perfect, and I write flash.

Ruin a book by adding a word: Never let me go go

Hear that? I’m almost perfect, and I write flash.

God I’m excited to see this reach 299 likes and never move past that

In what universe did they think this was a good idea?

In what universe did they think this was a good idea?

Writer friends: don’t give up. I was rejected 299 times before I got my 300th rejection.

Why is cafeteria pizza always the same? A square of dough with a scattering of cheese and pepperoni and a quiet voice whispering underneath it all as you chew explaining that if you give in, just a little, your life would be so much better. Why is that?

Good to be prepared

Today's announcements: after-school activities today will take place in flames, your parents have been notified of your intent to ask Stacy to the Homecoming Dance, and please ignore the body in locker 451. You will find the locker code written on the back page of your current textbook. Ignore it.

Career shift

Cannot think of anything less aspirational