Funniest genre of City handwringing is “Are the games all meaningless now?” Yeah man it’s sports, pass me a beer

In trying times it’s good to see City ignore the noise and focus on the only stat that matters: billable hours

Oh my god it’s happening

What if we kissed in the dressing room after red card for headbutt against Manchester United 😳😳

Not a single sentence in this Don Garber quote has any logical relationship with the ones before it

Gotta give the people a link to download the Wilfried Nancy agenda app

Man City could have made the whole thing go away just by spending more money but they were too committed to lying about it

I can't be the only one who thinks this

Cavan is a troop now, thank him for his service

Let's do it

Invite me on your podcast to talk about soccer data and I might, potentially, maybe get to my point before your social clip plays me offstage

Feel like he would approve of the corduroy too

Losing to the USMNT has got to be extra humiliating because you've got to listen to us do the worst fucking chants you've ever heard the whole time

Getting a little choked up realizing we'll never see these guys play together again until Saturday

It's pretty remarkable that the most famous guy in the world, the richest guy in the world and the most powerful guy in the world are all the exact same kind of pathetic loser

... become?

Low on the list of MLS scheduling crimes but it's pretty funny that they tried to play this Chicago-Vancouver game during the World Cup knockouts and then rescheduled it at the same time as a USMNT-Canada game Do you know how hard it is to book a club game with a double national team conflict

According to the bookies Man City are simultaneously second favorites to win the Premier League and fourth favorites to be relegated, no word on the odds for the Chaos Parlay

Yeah Joveljic playing other soccer players in chess is basically like Joveljic lacing up in your rec league