Haus of Decline (@hausofdecline.bsky.social)

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 1, 2026, 6:04 PM Pinned

I Don't Sleep Well (Title)

I Don't Sleep Well. The title is rendered in biological looking script. The action takes place in the cross section of an apartment, where the characters are in front of a large window with the angle such that we are looking down on to the street. Insect arms reach out to a woman, whose silhouette is replicated behind her. The moon shines down.

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 12, 2026, 6:06 PM

Men: You are disposable. Your worth as a human is only tied to your accomplishments. Women: You are "The Hunted"

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 12, 2026, 6:05 PM

One thing I've learned since the whole gender transition thing is that men have a lot to deal with, but being a woman is constant Spongebob Silent Hill Hallway meme

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 12, 2026, 5:09 PM

60

Two weeks later, an exhausted Diane whimpers "need sleep need sleep." Her phone BINKs and she receives a text message from Peter saying "Heyyyyyyyyyy" She thinks to herself "play it cool, Diane." She texts back "Fuck my neck."

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 12, 2026, 5:08 PM

59

At work, Diane congregates around the water cooler with a man who has the sides of his head shaved, but a tuft of hair remains up top. He says "Diane! I've been doing that bloodletting thing and I've been sleeping like a euthanized dog." He compliments her "also. GUUURRLL, you are serving above average cunt. Need to know you're routine." Flattered, Diane replies "Thanks Alfonso. It's just..." She puts her hand up to her face with girlish infatuation and continues "I think I have a boyfriend."

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 12, 2026, 5:08 PM

58

Peter takes out his phone and says "give me your number. I'll text you when I know my schedule better." He takes his hat from the hat stand and prepares to exit. Diane asks "so... next week? Two weeks?" Peter, not looking at her, says "yeah, something like that..." He leaves and slams the door shut.

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 12, 2026, 5:07 PM

57

Peter says "Can't. Going to that MMA-themed gastropub with the boys." Diane with melancholic acceptance says "oh... okay. What are you doing on Friday?" Peter says "the Clippers are in town and they're my team, so..." Diane looks dejected.

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 12, 2026, 5:06 PM

56

Diane looks at Peter with suspicion, but relents, saying "never mind..." Sheepishly, she asks "so, um... I need a lot more help sleeping. You wanna meet up tomorrow?"

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 11, 2026, 7:18 PM

55

Diane, stares for a moment in disbelief. The bug enters the living room with a joint and a lighter. Diane inquires "your actual name is Peter Bugdanovich?" She narrows her eyes "like the director?" Peter, lighting the joint is confused and asks "who? who are you talking about?"

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 11, 2026, 7:18 PM

54

Diane asks the bug "hey... what's your name?" The bug replies "it's peter..." She asks "what's your last name?" The bug, drying a dish, says "Bugdanovich..."

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 11, 2026, 7:17 PM

53

He presents her with a plate. It is The perfect French Omelette. She goes in for a bite as the bug watches the dishes. She is surprised at how good it tastes.

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 11, 2026, 7:16 PM

52

Diane looks on into her kitchen, where the bug who has apparently spend the night is cooking something. He waves to her and says "hey, I'm makin' eggs."

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 11, 2026, 7:14 PM

51

Diane wake up on the couch. She basks blissfully in the morning light as maurice lies down on the top of the couch. She is covered in a blanket. She rises, noticing something peculiar.

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 11, 2026, 7:03 PM

Also as you get older, you start Dave Barry-posting. I am folksy and relatable dangit!

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 11, 2026, 6:57 PM

Quite partial to this guy

Katie Freeway holding small beige ceramic bowl

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 11, 2026, 6:49 PM

Aaron Boone's New York Yankees are so funny. They're like a gigantic intimidating God of War boss that nonetheless have a big red obvious glowing weak point labelled "fielding."

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 11, 2026, 6:25 PM

As you get older, you realize the importance of having a large amount of shallow bowls in which to put small amounts of discrete objects

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 11, 2026, 5:06 PM

I'm bendy!

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 11, 2026, 4:42 PM

I am like Elastigirl in that I have Ehlers-Danlos syndrome

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 11, 2026, 4:38 PM

😁😁😁

@hausofdecline.bsky.social Oct 11, 2026, 4:35 PM

Sweaters! I pledge my allegiance to sweatergang