#SecretTick 17. Pub atmosphere of year contender! Thought micro, felt WMC, decided ‘just a great pub’. Live music, versions of House of Rising Sun, Fog on Tyne n Ring of Fire sang rough like a 7% farmhouse cider. Locals gorgeous. Future of the pub is safe.

#SecretTick 16 . Confusingist brew tap EVER. Fake Tosh doesn’t help. Bloke with a Grimsby Peterhead Cocaine fishing heritage jinxes our game. Way back from loo paved with rectal alien intentions.

#SecretTick 15 Mauled by the Tigres n mosaic Misfits. V impressive barman. Dad wants to hire him for his unknown company. Students fail to get discount cos they don’t know what a telephone looks like. Juicy stuff. Impressed. Great music too.

#SecretTick 14 , been here before under old name gah! Much better this time around due to no standing corridor wankness, & Daddy loved their hazy ways n a cracking bloke duo + nervy dog . Man gets me on the Dorking, but I’m the only dork here.

#SecretTick 13. The twildery competes with barrage of imagined mobility scooters at this uncompromising Spoons. Slow service but by gum that Citra is a pinger. Deserved GBGer. Carpet only 6.5. Daddy enjoy his first highlighting and is now reading names of northern actors.

Good morning all from a cloudy York ☁️ and happy weekends 🍻

Continuing the #SecretTick season to help reduce the cruel churn of the new GBG. Still embargoed til next Thu,

Mascot debut for Hook Norton Scruffy.
#BRAPA

#SecretTick 11.

I’m wet through, bloody weather 🌧️

Hate rum infused porters, but got one anyway. Nicer than some. Men piss outdoors. Family make fun of my photo. Barmaid pronounces Mayo with some crazy vowel work. Sat on only comfy bench.

#SecretTick 10 , 4 ticks before 1:30pm. Sit down North Devon! #StillScarred

Jumpy micro, comfier through back? Canny bloke Brasso’s handpulls ,looks rude.
Tells me & other bloke beer like licking Christmas tree. Minty too!
Bonus Cilla in the bog. Apportioning wrong IMO

#SecretTick 9. Vaulty Holty! Might be their first outlet in Nth Devon so don’t assume. Despite amazing barmaidery by Dangerous Eyelashes (recommending me an IPA I can’t see), too extensive n grey like the sky. “Gonna fooking rain” says bloke in grey coat to grey hoodie.

#SecretTick 7. First ‘Spoons of the new season. Top staff engagement, I actually got told off (jokily) for not knowing my pint needed topping up. But did it? It looks a mess but tastes decent. Carpet 7.5. Calming air duct blowing sounds n serene atmosphere.

Good morning pub friends,

#SecretTick day as we look to reduce the deficit on the #CruelChurn following the release of the new GBG. Still under embargo until next Thursday.

Have a beer filled Friday wherever you are.

And welcome new mascot Absorba Thomas 🧽

#BRAPA

#SecretTick 6. Very atmospheric gorgeous low down booze hole. Staff are like Vietnamese gazelles and leaping lizards. The Old Peculiar kicks like a moody mule. Stuffy scarf man wants a Guinness. He might be a millionaire.

#SecretTick 5 loadsa ales on, nice people but pub a bit blah , i am recommended the Fallen Angel by Church End which is either local or very not. Packs huge punch anyway.

#SecretTick 4 Boozer! Best yet. Bloke checks im not from Leicester before slagging it off. Loves the Vine at Coates best, hates pub opposite. Chatty buggers. Good flooring. I accidentally open a discourse on every local pub in area, then go for wee.

#SecretTick 3. Upset a bloke by (a) accidentally pushing in at bar (b) slagging off every other pub in town when he is landlord of one. FFS. He admitted his didn’t deserve GBG. Pub is grey & sick smelling. Also leafy, blokey, hardworking and beamy. Fascinating dichotomy.

#SecretTick 2 . Good age to this inn and a Broadside that screams ‘I deserve to be in the GBG, but don’t get pissed Si’. Filling up with twee lunchers who haven’t got the pub memo, how long does a pair of hands take to dry? RSPCA say thanks. Bus on horizon.

#SecretTick 1 - surprise 11:30 chaos at this rural cutie with 8.5 carpet and top hanging muggery. Are all the random lurkers staff gearing up to serve lunch, punters waiting for reserved tables to kick in, or thirsty bogtrotters from fields? Highlighted under the table.

Good morning pub fans from a sleepy mildly autumnal train to the south east.

The New GBG is here 🥳. So I now enter the 2 wk period of embargo ticking. Join me later for our first #SecretTick

I lock down on 3617 (80.4% of the Guide)

#BRAPA