Poems & books #byme
Graphics, video & voiceover #bym
Music - Pixabay.com

#sophiaasmah #poetry

Now I need to figure out how to help my comet partner to escape, as well. If anyone wants to hire a live-in artist, they have MANY skills, and are super cute. <3

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Long thread where I talk about moving to England from Florida 20 years ago. There's always more I could say (forgot to mention theatre & wrestling!), but 17 entries is more than enough for now. The summary is: I miss things there, but I love things here. The choice was a good un. I'll stay!

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So thanks to Amy of 20 years ago who somehow didn't overthink the biggest upheaval I would ever go through. Thanks to my parents for supporting me running off to marry a man they hadn't actually met yet! Thanks to his parents for taking me in. And thanks to Marc for keeping me. No take-backs.

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Where I am now I have my wonderful husband, my D&D & board game groups, & I want this to be forever. (side note- every time I get too happy something crazy happens and it all changes, so I'll knock on wood & take an extra anxiety pill.)

But the point is, I've got a life I don't want to leave. #byme

I literally made my first friends back in Cambridge by going to places with things I liked & looking around for people who looked cool. I then introduced myself & literally said "I just got to the country, will you be my friend?"

It WORKED. I miss my Cambs peeps. They helped so much.

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Even huge events packed with people still feel sortof compact compared to similar in the states. I love the personal feeling of it all. Even though a lot of Brits are taken aback when a strange American starts chatting with them, they've nearly all been perfectly lovely once the shock fades

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I should be more concerned about doxxing, I'm sure, but it's too cool not to mention. I love so much about this historic little down. I love when I get to travel around & see more of the UK- I made it a point to do more of that this year, which I'll continue. This place is NEAT.

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And I have made awesome friends here, & Marc's family have been SO wonderful to me, the places here are beautiful in a different way, there's so much HISTORY! I marvel at the view out my windows all the time. I can *walk* to a *CASTLE*. I hear concerts at the castle from my living room!

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There is SO much to love here! Yes, we have our own problems this side of the pond. But I have a job I can do from home, & I'm great at it! Marc has a creative job that he's great at! We OWN our home! We get to go fun places & do fun things & buy random stuff that makes us happy! Healthcare!
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Especially in Florida. That place really is the best of times & the worst of times. And with how things have been for a while now, I can hand-on-heart say I'd be arrested by now, or worse, if I was there. I wouldn't regret it. But I'm not in a hurry.

So the United Kingdom is where I live

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It breaks my heart every time I miss something important- weddings, funerals, all the kids my cousins have had, all the times someone I love ended up in hospital.

buuuut.... after 20 years? I still wouldn't move back. Because there are things I got away from that are so much worse.

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Again, I'll talk about how in love I am in November.

This is about the move. There are things, places, and people I miss so much from the states. A convenience, a variety, my family- both blood & found. The wild Florida weather & perfect beaches. Road trips hit different there. The food!

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No one in my life is making me feel like that intentionally, it's just a side-effect of being an immigrant, in my experience. People know as soon as I open my mouth that I'm an Other. It can be a little lonely sometimes.

But when I'm with Marc I feel like I'm home. Wherever that is.

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Things like tv shows that are absolutely everywhere for a decade so even if you don't watch it you get all the references... but it never made it overseas. I have that everywhere now.

That feeling I had growing up that everyone knew something I didn't is real now, and all the time.

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For now I wanted to focus on that move. How excited I was. Felt like I was in a movie.

Trying to adjust to a culture so like and unlike my own was real-life uncanny valley. It still is!! I feel like an alien observer all the time. But now when I go home, I feel it there, too. Time moved on.

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How I was scrambling to say goodbye to everyone, possibly forever. How in spite of my volatile track record, this time it was different, honest!

And it was. It was so much more than I ever even imagined. Marc is absolutely the best thing in my life. But I'll talk about that in a few weeks.

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I was reading some old journal entries from that week, & it made me more emotional than I was at the time. Writing about mom avoiding me because she kept crying, & I wasn't letting myself think about it, because I wanted to keep crying. But I just knew it would be the best choice I ever made.
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I left so much undone. My room was the scene of a very contained tornado. I think I left piles of comics I loved with friends because I ran out of time to get them back. I still have many boxes in storage at my parents, and collect some every time I go back.

I don't get to go back enough.
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20 years ago right now I was on a plane leaving everything I had known behind to take a chance on love in a different country. I was unusually certain it was the right choice. I made a mess of trying to pack & leave (Sorry fam!), but I got the paperwork right, and the man, too!

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