It's not the tragedies that trick us. It's the messes. I can't stand messes.

#DorothyParker #Parker

Godspeed

Oh, seek, my love, your newer way;
I'll not be left in sorrow.
So long as I have yesterday,
Go rake your damned tomorrow!

#DorothyParker #Parker

Ballade at Thirty-Five

...Princes, never I'd give offense,
Won't you think of me tenderly?
Here's my strength and my weakness, gents -
I loved them until they loved me.

#DorothyParker #Parker

To a neighbour who tolder her her dog was a female:
"I always call dogs 'he'. It don't do to notice everything."

#DorothyParker #Parker

#Donald Trump #Executive #Gulf #Gulf of #Main #Mexico #Parker #PEN #President #Trump #SHUT UP, PIGGY 🐷
🌐 www.newsmart.ch

On returning by boat from Spain:
"The crossing was so rough the only thing I could keep on my stomach was the First Mate."

#DorothyParker #Parker

On her pregnancy:
"It serves me right for putting all my eggs in one bastard."

#DorothyParker #Parker

People ought to be one of two things, young or old. No - what's the use of fooling? People ought to be one of two things, young or dead.

#DorothyParker #Parker

Time doth flit,
Oh shit!

#DorothyParker #Parker

On hearing that President Calvin Coolidge had died:
"How could they tell?"

#DorothyParker #Parker

To a supercilious youth who said he "simply couldn't bear fools":
"How odd. Your mother could apparently."

#DorothyParker #Parker

On being asked if she was going to join Alcoholics Anonymous :
"Certainly not. They'd want me to stop now."

#DorothyParker #Parker

Name for a pet parrot:
"Onan" (because he spilled his seed on the bottom of his cage.)

#DorothyParker #Parker

Time doth flit,
Oh shit!

#DorothyParker #Parker

There always must be some kind of hitch.
Isn't nature (finish this line for yourself
and get a year's subscription to the Boston Post).

#DorothyParker #Parker

#Alaska #capsized #Parker #survival
🌐 www.newsmart.ch

Of a Hollywood neighbour who had had his portrait painted in the nude with outsize genitals:
"It's so real, you almost feel he could speak to you, don't you?"

#DorothyParker #Parker

The Flaw In Paganism

Drink and dance and laugh and lie
Love, the reeling midnight through,
For tomorrow we shall die!
(But, alas, we never do.)

#DorothyParker #Parker

FirstService Residential Enters Colorado with Exciting New Community Development #United_States #Parker #Dream_Finders_Homes #FirstService_Residential #Reverie_at_Looking_Glass

Travel, trouble, music, art
A kiss, a frock, a rhyme -
I never said they feed my heart
But still they pass the time.

#DorothyParker #Parker