Challenged to use the word "horticulture" in a sentence:
"You can lead a whore to culture, but you can't make her think."

#DorothyParker #Parker

#California #freeway #judge #killed #Parker #Uber
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Introducing her first husband:
"I want you to meet my little husband."

#DorothyParker #Parker

To a friend who was upset that he had to get rid of his cat:
"Have you tried curiosity?"

#DorothyParker #Parker

As far as I'm concerned, the most beautiful word in the English language is "cellar-door".

#DorothyParker #Parker

Nickname for Alexander Woollcott's New York apartment:
"Wit's End."

#DorothyParker #Parker

Leaving her place one day at the Algonquin Round Table:
"Excuse me, I have to go to the bathroom."
(pause)
"I really have to telephone, but I'm too embarassed to say so."

#DorothyParker #Parker

#California #freeway #killed #Parker #Uber
🌐 www.newsmart.ch

On being told that Harold Ross had called her on her honeymoon demanding belated copy:
"tell him I've been too fucking busy - or vice versa."

#DorothyParker #Parker

On being asked if she was going to join Alcoholics Anonymous :
"Certainly not. They'd want me to stop now."

#DorothyParker #Parker

John Huston is doing something called, very simply, The Bible. Now you must admit that's a big job. I think he's going to stop with Moses because he can't stand another moment - he is playing Moses, you see.

#DorothyParker #Parker

On her pregnancy:
"It serves me right for putting all my eggs in one bastard."

#DorothyParker #Parker

As I was saying to the landlord only this morning, "You can't have everything."

#DorothyParker #Parker

#freeway #killed #Parker #Uber
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Paying her last respects to Scott Fitzgerald as eh lay in an undertaker's parlor in Los Angeles, and quoting the words of a mourner at the funer of Jay Gatsby:
"The poor son-of-a-bitch!"

#DorothyParker #Parker

Two Volume Novel

The sun's gone dim, and
The moon's turned black;
For I loved him, and
He didn't love back.

#DorothyParker #Parker

Two Volume Novel

The sun's gone dim, and
The moon's turned black;
For I loved him, and
He didn't love back.

#DorothyParker #Parker

Of the 1930s:
"They were progressive days. We thought we were going to make the world better - I forget why we thought it, but we did."

#DorothyParker #Parker

Isn't it a bit presumptuous of us to be alive now that Mr. Benchley is dead?

#DorothyParker #Parker

I require only three things of a man: he must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid.

#DorothyParker #Parker