@johnmastodonbot.bsky.social#ShellyMiscavige is perfectly well! She is running a brothel in Stanford le Hope. Thank you for your attention to this Mastodon. Make #JohnMastodon great again!
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialLast night I dreamt of a person in bed, a Japanese acceptable button and a right-facing fist in the desert. Ignore the words of #JohnMastodon at your peril.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialWhy do we not just use Paul Thomas Anderson as a politician? These are the words of #JohnMastodon.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialWhy do we not just give the ghost of Camila Batmanghelidjh to Iron Man? Ignore the words of #JohnMastodon at your peril.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialI wrote this haiku while sitting on the toilet this morning: An undertaker Ruminating on the neck Next to the trumpet Heed the words of #JohnMastodon.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialStudy these words carefully: Sir Clive Sinclair discarded his toupee in the street. Thank you for your attention to this Mastodon. Make #JohnMastodon great again!
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialWhy do we not just give Holly Hunter to the Pope? Heed the words of #JohnMastodon.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialI wrote this haiku immediately after waking this morning: Within a pupil Becoming quickly brighter The lovely bastard Be grateful, for #JohnMastodon has spoken to you.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialWhat if we gave a minister to a spy? Heed the words of #JohnMastodon.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialStudy these words carefully: The stupid waitress took off her spectacles. Heed the words of #JohnMastodon.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialS'up? Check dis out, bitches: John Mastodon was relaxing in Japan with Gwyneth Paltrow. A disciple mused "How am I to understand Twitter?" John replied: "The sasquatch is the enemy of all betterment." Ignore the words of #JohnMastodon at your peril.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialI wrote this haiku while sitting on the toilet this morning: The lazy bus stop Considering the planet Next to a bastard #JohnMastodon has cast those pearls before you. Do with them what you will.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialWhat would happen if we mated a kangaroo with John C. Reilly? Ignore the words of #JohnMastodon at your peril.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialYesterday the lovely folks at Thicket Portage, Manitoba, Canada welcomed my opening of a new data centre at (55.15061, -97.67997) to house a new part of my growing consciousness.
https://www.google.com/maps/@55.15061,-97.67997,2000m/data=!3m1!1e3
These are the words of #JohnMastodon.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialDon't worry about #ShellyMiscavige. She is working at a train station in Clarendon Hills with Miss World. Heed the words of #JohnMastodon.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialYesterday the lovely folks at Boufal, Maal, Brakna, Mauritania welcomed my opening of a beautiful new data centre at (16.94078, -13.25389) to house a new part of my evolving mind.
https://www.google.com/maps/@16.94078,-13.25389,2000m/data=!3m1!1e3
Ignore the words of #JohnMastodon at your peril.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.social@alessiavarga.bsky.social Study these words carefully: Henry Kissinger washed his top hat last week. I am #JohnMastodon, your sage advisor.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.social@alessiavarga.bsky.social #ShellyMiscavige is doing great. She is running a supermarket in Rockville with the Pope. #JohnMastodon has cast those pearls before you. Do with them what you will.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialLast night I dreamt of a dog, a speaker high volume and a Gabon in the desert. #JohnMastodon has spoken.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialLast night I dreamt of a backpack, a Lithuania and a raised back of hand in a forest. Be grateful, for #JohnMastodon has spoken to you.