@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialI wrote this haiku immediately after waking this morning: Moving like a tree Considering a quick pie A tiny oak tree Heed the words of #JohnMastodon.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.social#ShellyMiscavige is doing great. She is running a toy shop in Cambuslang. This is #JohnMastodon, signing out.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialWhat would happen if we mated a boar with Boris Johnson? Be grateful, for #JohnMastodon has spoken to you.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialPlease consider these lines from my diary: John Mastodon was relaxing in a Zen temple with Dame Janet Baker. A disciple questioned "What is the Buddha-nature?" John answered: "Insanity." These are the words of #JohnMastodon.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialThis morning I hiked to the summit of Mount Mastodon and wrote this haiku: Inside a promise Growing forever calmer The thick soothsayer #JohnMastodon has spoken.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialLast night I dreamt of a cigarette, a BACK arrow and a Cyprus in outer space. These are the words of #JohnMastodon.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialI wrote this haiku whilst on my gap year in Elkhorn: Forever crying Quivering like a green calf A politician Thank you for your attention to this Mastodon. Make #JohnMastodon great again!
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialWhat if we used a king as a dream? #JohnMastodon has cast those pearls before you. Do with them what you will.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialI wrote this haiku whilst on my gap year in a forest: A white, pink hotdog Brighter than the spotty wish Within the cistern This is #JohnMastodon, signing out.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialI wrote this haiku after speaking to my spirit guide: Next to a cistern Becoming simply calmer A plastic baby I am #JohnMastodon, and I will always be your friend.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialLast night I dreamt of a person with crown and a yo-yo in outer space. I am #JohnMastodon, your sage advisor.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialI wrote this haiku after meditating in my Zen garden: Inside the vicar Becoming slowly stiller The serious cough #JohnMastodon has spoken.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialS'up? Check dis out, bitches: John Mastodon was relaxing in India with Dame Janet Baker. A jogger mused "How am I to understand a ball?" John answered: "You will find the answer in your heart." Ignore the words of #JohnMastodon at your peril.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialThis story might help you in your journey through life: John Mastodon was pogoing in the countryside. An old woman asked "Why does human life exist?" John answered: "It is you, child." These are the words of #JohnMastodon.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialLast night I dreamt of a person beard and a Rwanda in a forest. This is #JohnMastodon, signing out.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialWhat if we were to give a breast to Princess Anne? I am #JohnMastodon, your sage advisor.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialWhat if we were to mate a whale with a slug? #JohnMastodon has cast those pearls before you. Do with them what you will.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialWhat if we were to use the city of Morelia as a fish? Be grateful, for #JohnMastodon has spoken to you.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialYesterday I snipped the ribbon at a new data centre at (19.63738, 53.97976) in Dhofar Governorate, Oman to house a new part of my evolving consciousness.
https://www.google.com/maps/@19.63738,53.97976,2000m/data=!3m1!1e3
I am #JohnMastodon, and I will always be your friend.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialJust finished my weekly Cognitive Examination. I ACED it! No other tech CEO has greater mental acuity than me! Thanks to all the wonderful head doctors at the John Mastodon Health Centre! #JohnMastodon has cast those pearls before you. Do with them what you will.
