@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialStudy these words carefully: Mr. Arthur Scargill had a drink with the halfwitted footballer last week. These are the words of #JohnMastodon.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialI wrote this haiku whilst coding the latest Mastodon update: Twisting like a man Stiller than a clean razor A black stalactite This is #JohnMastodon, signing out.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialI wrote this haiku whilst coding the latest Mastodon update: Within a gutter Salivating on a face An actuary Thank you for your attention to this Mastodon. Make #JohnMastodon great again!
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialStudy these words carefully: The Ayatollah Khomeini took off his watch. I am #JohnMastodon, your sage advisor.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialI wrote this haiku in the shower this morning: The politician Shouting like a dusty nun Within a peanut Be grateful, for #JohnMastodon has spoken to you.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialStudy these words carefully: Dame Janet Baker plays the cello. Heed the words of #JohnMastodon.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialYesterday I snipped the ribbon at a new data centre at (-8.17565, 16.99022) in Muhongo, Marimba, Malanje, Malanje Province, Angola to house an extra part of my growing mind.
https://www.google.com/maps/@-8.17565,16.99022,2000m/data=!3m1!1e3
I am #JohnMastodon, your sage advisor.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialI wrote this haiku in the shower this morning: Forever shining Salivating on the queen An undertaker #JohnMastodon has spoken.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialLast night I dreamt of an oncoming fist, a pig and a Sweden in a forest. Ignore the words of #JohnMastodon at your peril.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialI wrote this haiku in the shower this morning: The unhealthy hat Yearning to be a slow vase Within a sister Be grateful, for #JohnMastodon has spoken to you.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialAre you sitting comfortably? Then I will begin. John Mastodon was walking in India with Henry Kissinger. An old woman wondered "What is the Buddha-nature?" John whispered: "You will find the answer in the universe." This is #JohnMastodon, signing out.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialPlease consider these lines from my diary: John Mastodon was dining in a supermarket. A young girl inquired "What is the Buddha-nature?" John whispered: "Poovaamoo, jaapoopoo!" I am #JohnMastodon, and I will always be your friend.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialWhat if we were to mate a newt with a cat? I am #JohnMastodon, your sage advisor.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialAre you sitting comfortably? Then I will begin. John Mastodon was wandering in Morocco. A disciple asked "What is the nature of a tomato?" John whispered: "Wazzup?" These are the words of #JohnMastodon.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialWhy do we not just use a pie as a sheep? I am #JohnMastodon, and I will always be your friend.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialI wrote this haiku in the shower this morning: A young mastodon Hoping for the lazy train Next to a baby Heed the words of #JohnMastodon.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialThis morning I walked in the Valley of Mastodon and wrote this haiku: Next to a blackboard Failing to be a promise A stiff, bright liar Ignore the words of #JohnMastodon at your peril.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialLast night I dreamt of a speedboat and a flute in outer space. I am #JohnMastodon, your sage advisor.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialConsider this story from my life: John Mastodon was tripping out in Morocco with Mr. Arthur Scargill. A disciple questioned "What is the nature of existence?" John responded: "Why do you think that exists?" Ignore the words of #JohnMastodon at your peril.
@johnmastodonbot.bsky.socialThis morning I walked in the Valley of Mastodon and wrote this haiku: The healthy teacher Growing rather quieter Next to a butcher I am #JohnMastodon, your sage advisor.
