It counts!

At this hotel long enough that the night doormen don’t ask for my key after hours they just give me fist bumps and welcome me home 💚

Brb weeping at the beauty and majesty of autumn.

Beautiful bookstores and cider at farmer’s markets and hosting a panel with horror powerhouses and running through Times Square laughing to make it in time for my first Broadway show and stumbling upon the library on my walk home. NY… I get it 💚

Leather jacket squeaking in the backseat of a taxi on every turn.

“Marriage is painful it’s better than celibacy” What’s a nice way to tell a driver you’ll tip more if they stop speaking to you 😬 (*tucks and rolls out of car*)

This is particularly offensive on this, the 3rd day of October.

My mom broke her foot and is now in a boot. A couple of weeks after that, my sister broke her foot and is in a boot. And last night, my gf broke her toe and is now in a boot! They all took boot season to another level this year.

Day 2 of 31 days of being in *the best freakin mood* October, where the hell have you been, loca!

10000% stuck in the Backrooms. Made it out, will not be returning

Brother, I lived it

One good thing about going to an office with other humans is I got to go around and pass out candy corn packets to unsuspecting folks today like some sort of weird fairy that visits once a year. (Usually Ookie is the sole witness to the candy corn parade)

Day 1 of 31 days of being in *the best freakin mood* 🎃🦇 (A good neighbor for the feminine rage that burns eternally in the depths of my soul)

Parked in a different section and came up into an entirely different building than intended but it looked only *slightly* different from the building I was supposed to be in. Absolute early morning horror movie.

LAX really deters you from wanting to take a rideshare, these shuttles are wack

On an airplane looking totally normal and casual with GWAR blood stains on my hands and shoes.

Now seated for a movie rated “five butthole puckers out of five.”

I did not bring a belt to Austin but I did bring needs a belt pants.

Thank you!!!! 💚💚💚