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Witney Thee Stallion

@witneyseibold.bsky.social

972 Following3.2k Followers

Critic, essayist, semi-talented snot. Co-host of the podcasts on the Critically Acclaimed Network. Bylines at /Film, IGN, Umbrella Entertainment, Shout! and many others. Rotten Tomatoes-approved. He/him. SubGenius. đź’–đź’śđź’™

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@witneyseibold.bsky.socialOct 10, 2026, 6:26 PM

Don't you have to, like, play a lot of non-customized games before you even know what your preferences are?

@witneyseibold.bsky.socialOct 9, 2026, 9:53 PM

Hm...

@moryan.bsky.socialOct 9, 2026, 3:55 PMReposted by @witneyseibold.bsky.social

🚨 Writer / journalism folks, please share: Slate is hiring a staff writer jobs.lever.co/slate/61b849...

@witneyseibold.bsky.socialOct 9, 2026, 4:26 PM

He's Ecco the Dolphin.

@witneyseibold.bsky.socialOct 9, 2026, 3:21 PM

Pain is just coffee leaving the body, or however that goes.

@witneyseibold.bsky.socialOct 9, 2026, 2:57 PM

*Runs to Kalshi

@socialistdogmom.bsky.socialOct 9, 2026, 1:54 PMReposted by @witneyseibold.bsky.social

this execution by firing squad is brought to you by crypto dot com

@witneyseibold.bsky.socialOct 8, 2026, 11:21 PM

I look at pieces like this and wonder why I'm not working at the trades, writing better reviews and op-eds.

@witneyseibold.bsky.socialOct 7, 2026, 8:36 PM

That's okay. Clouds are assholes.

@witneyseibold.bsky.socialOct 7, 2026, 12:51 AM

I read recently that the prolonged rehashing of 1980s kid media is now called "courting the grandpa market," and, yeah. Gen-Alpha doesn't give a shit about Transformers, Ghostbusters, Gremlins, He-Man, Star Wars. Those movies are for 58-year-olds.

@gingerest.bsky.socialOct 7, 2026, 12:48 AMReposted by @witneyseibold.bsky.social

when an eel bites your DICK and the pain makes you SICK that's a MORAY

@witneyseibold.bsky.socialOct 6, 2026, 2:55 PM

I CAN'T WAIT FOR BATMAN VS. STAR TREK.

@nancycomics.bsky.socialOct 6, 2026, 2:19 PMReposted by @witneyseibold.bsky.social

Nancy By Ernie Bushmiller October 06,1944

P1- SLUGGO SEES NANCY STANDING ON THE CORNER AND SHE IS HOLDING A STICK UP IN THE AIR
SLUGGO: WHATCHA DOIN’ NANCY?
NANCY:I JUST FINISHED ANOTHER PAINTING 
P2- NANCY: AND I WANT TO GET A GOOD PRICE FOR IT
P3-SLUGGO SEES THAT NANCY HAS HOOKED HER PAINTING WITH A PIECE OF STRING AND IS HOLDING IT INSIDE THE WINDOW OF THE MUSEUM OF ART
NANCY : NOW I CAN TELL PEOPLE THAT IT ONCE HUNG IN THE MUSEUM
@witneyseibold.bsky.socialOct 6, 2026, 2:48 PM

Hollywood burns.

@williambibbiani.bsky.socialSep 2, 2026, 7:49 PMReposted by @witneyseibold.bsky.social

A critic isn't "trustworthy" because they always tell their audience what they want or expect to hear. That's not trustworthy, that's suspicious. A critic is trustworthy if they're not afraid to give their audience their honest opinion, even if nobody else agrees with them or wants to hear it.

@witneyseibold.bsky.socialOct 6, 2026, 4:04 AM

Clearly not.

@mtsw.bsky.socialOct 6, 2026, 2:48 AMReposted by @witneyseibold.bsky.social

Saying he'd be cool with Iran nuking my home city is pretty bad but not quite as bad as when Hillary said some trump supporters were deplorable so I can see why the media turned the latter into a major scandal and not the former

BBayliss Wagner@baylisswagner.bsky.socialOct 5, 2026, 11:49 PM

BREAKING: In Nebraska rally, Trump just suggested he would be unbothered to see Iran "take out" LA or San Diego: “They could take out a city,” he said. “Let them take—Let them take out Los Angeles. Let them take out San Diego. That’s—this is a very small price to pay."

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@witneyseibold.bsky.socialOct 6, 2026, 12:59 AM

It's still fun if I love grease.

@witneyseibold.bsky.socialOct 6, 2026, 12:49 AM

Those things with Arkanoid in em?

@witneyseibold.bsky.socialOct 5, 2026, 10:19 PM

Hope this is that zombie virus I've heard so much about.

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