And for the record Pez, in Spanish, means fish. But if it is caught, it's Pescado. It only becomes Pescado if you're able to eat it. There is nothing like this in any other language in the world.

Buy a tote bag, get your kids an advent calendar. There are stickers and temporary tattoos and T-shirts. You are supporting a great cause and supporting STEM for kids who need it. You all have a kid in your life who is better than a career at Taco Bell. Give them a better option.

Me: Bought a big ass house in a desirable neighborhood for $365K Redfin: Your house is worth $685K if you want to sell, contact an agent. Me: Fuck you, people think I'm upper middle class! I grew up in the projects.

Religious freedom applies to white Christians. Anyone else is treated as less than and a threat. I'm not religious, I don't shame people for being religious, but they do a really good job of shaming themselves.

My bed is about mid thigh for me, I'm tall enough that people ask why I didn't play sports so for a 5' woman, it's like the warped wall on American Ninja Warrior just to get into bed. I got tired of lifting them, so I made some steps.

Just arrived at my favorite discount grocery store. Five feet past the door and I already have 11 more pounds of coffee. Total cost so far, $7. Hopefully they have some canned meat in the canned meat aisle.

I have bed steps. I put them on the other side from where I sleep because I don't need them and I have a thing for 5'ish women. My bed is about 4' off the floor. I blame that on the super fluffy mattresses they sell everywhere now.

I'm just wondering how many septuagenarians are waiting to hear back from their friend MAGAPhilTrump2028 and not making the connection between the bot farm being bombed out and the absolute silence on Facebook.

Teachers and clergy are 80 times more likely to be child molesters than the general public. Cops are 300 times more likely. Basically, anyone capable of becoming a cop should, by no means, be allowed to do the job.

I talked to all five Panthers fans and they're very happy today.

I bought it to make a Recipe from the Bob's Burgers cookbook. It's the "Bet it all on Black Garlic" burger. It requires making Black Garlic Tappenade, which means if I have them again, I will have eaten Tappenade twice.

Black garlic is fermented regular garlic.

I'm doing black beans and black garlic because I bought some black garlic so it's going in everything until it's gone

That sounds delicious. I may make some this week. Fall recipes are in full effect this week.

It's 4:20 somewhere.

I'm making some right now.

I hope she flipped off all 23 people there.