Bunty & I have had our legs tattooed too. She has a Val Doonican collage on her left & on her right a dramatic portrayal of Liz Truss trickling down. My legs are covered in moths & conkers with pictures of Norman Tebbit & calligraphy featuring lyrics from Chaka Demus & Pliers.🦵

Great result for The Conservatives! Labour-Just clung on Greens-Expected to win with their weird leader & failed Reform-Finished Lib Dem-couldn’t get a 1000! Restore-😝 People want to be able to leave £1M tax free for their children that’s why they are now turning to us Tories.🇬🇧

I thought Throuple was a quaint village in Suffolk Bunty and I visited on a weekend break back in 2021. This Great British Bake Off programme has become a viper’s nest of filth and pornography.😡

Ha ha you oiks! We Conservatives are BACK! Well done Tory Chairman Kevin Hollinrake. He should have brought on an Eton tie, a dead pheasant, a wax jacket, a book by Jeffery Archer & a photo of Maggie. We are so kicking arse. Suck it up (As Dean my paperboy says)! 🤪🇬🇧

Do listen to Brexit Brian (below). He is the first line of defence in our ‘Britannia Shield.’ We Conservatives our confident that our iron dome will protect this great nation! 🇬🇧

How lovely to see AJ Pritchard the ex Strictly dancer in his new role as a political commentator on GB News:

For a long time I have heard rumours of secret flights into Dubai: plane loads of complete nutcases. I have never believed it and still don’t. If true, it should bring down Isabel Oakeshott as she is one. 🤪

Mike Graham is a controversial character. His recent jokes about Andy Burnham’s father suffering from Alzheimer’s have landed him in hot water. Whether you love him or hate him, one thing you can’t deny is that he has devastatingly good looks and is a really handsome chap.😬

I’m seriously worried about Lee Anderson MP. It’s been over 3 weeks since he has filmed himself fingering his meaty flaps. Has he: -Died? -Converted to Islam? -Turned vegan? -Had one of those stomach bugs that leads to what Dean our paperboy calls the “sharts?” -Lost his false teeth?🤔

A sad, lonely woman jilted by her brash lover is left to wile away the empty hours in an isolated flat in Dubai. After consuming yet another vodka her mind wanders & she types out far fetched fantasies desperately seeking attention & solace. Please could someone call a doctor.😬

Surely it is time for the authorities to take this Fairford terrorism case out of the hands of the police & pass it over to Nigel Farage, Richard Tice & Isabel Oakeshott etc. These people have the expertise & skills to have this all solved & explained to the public by tonight.👍

I’m beginning to worry about Liz Truss…😊

Our Danny Who art in prison Racist be thy name Thy balaclava come Thy will be done In ports as it is on dinghies Give us this day Our daily funding & forgive us our racism as we intimidate those who speak against us & lead us all into aggravation But deliver us from being civil. 🙏

Our Danny Who art in prison Racist be thy name Thy balaclava come Thy will be done In ports as it is on dinghies Give us this day Our daily funding & forgive us our racism as we intimidate those who speak against us & lead us all into aggravation But deliver us from being civil. 🙏

Huge apologies. My wife Bunty and I have been hacked by an AI program. Hopefully this matter will be resolved by tomorrow. 😬

Mr Tommo’s local vicar in front of his church ‘Are Blessid Laydee and All Are Souls.’

This is Reform UK Councillor Jaymey looking ‘cute.’ Isn’t he gorgeous? My only worry is I hope he hasn’t suffered autism in this photo & has posed Gregg Wallace style without his trousers on. Jaymey has allegedly had some Masterchef issues before involving a sausage & veg dish.😳

Andy Burnham. Drinks 12-15 cups of tea a day? Ha! What a wimp. When we Conservatives were in power Nadine Dorries was drinking 12-15 bottles of vodka a day. 😊💪

Reform UK MPs are apparently in charge of this parliamentary inquiry & have found out the reasons for our Eurovision failures. -Migrants -Too many regulations against Crypto Billionaires -Rachel the Piddington leftie -The RNLI They believe Ed Sheeran should be this year’s entry.😊