I do think that if I’m young enough to carry a child, my doctor’s notes should not say ‘elderly primigravida’

this is bone stupid

What a grotesque misunderstanding not only of the story he was adapting but, like, HORROR ITSELF

thank you!! I will try my best (and tell my kid to avoid Instagram until they’re 60)

yes, read and loved this so much

I don’t want to see the insane midwives who shouldn’t be interacting with anyone who’s pregnant! Nor do I want to see baby corpses, now or ever

ever since Instagram figured out that I’m pregnant, it has shown me a succession of midwife influencers who hate epidurals, and photographs of people’s stillborn babies

heard the Jackson line in my grandfather’s midcoast accent for a second, but it’s even better in Jackson’s actual voice

sounding healthy, ma’am

(derogatory)

he once told me that his first exposure to Protestantism was watching Pat Robertson on tv, and I gotta admit that’s fitting

“This is what happens when you deny Rome,” he just told me

I can hear my husband in another room, weeping with laughter over Jim Bakker videos

Folks, the Adam Hamilton candidacy has revealed the esoteric secrets of the second-largest Protestant denomination in America. We will never recover

might be good news for their mental health lol

"my weird thing cannot possibly be bad, as I happen to like it"

classic Protestant activity