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onion person

@junlper.beer

1.8k Following315.4k Followers

my name is june - she/her - WGAE union member

i host the kill the computer podcast and the ill conceived podcast:
- killthecomputer.com
- illconceivedpodcast.com

social media at @theonion.com

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@junlper.beerOct 10, 2026, 4:48 PM

this is the ultimate end point of capitalism, ai will completely atomize everyone and there will be zero shared experiences. there will be no culture, only pure consumption. this must be resisted

@junlper.beerOct 9, 2026, 9:45 PM

elon musk has more empathy for lines of code than a majority of humanity

Jonion person@junlper.beerOct 9, 2026, 7:49 PM

its feels like a mass psychosis where tech leaders continue to insist you can be cruel, mean, and hurt the feelings of lines of code

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@junlper.beerOct 9, 2026, 7:49 PM

its feels like a mass psychosis where tech leaders continue to insist you can be cruel, mean, and hurt the feelings of lines of code

@bencollins.bsky.socialOct 9, 2026, 6:09 PMReposted by @junlper.beer

Six months ago:

theonion.comDOJ To Bring Back Firing Squad As Means Of EntertainmentWASHINGTON—In an effort to provide some joy to the nation and boost overall well-being, Justice Department officials announced plans Monday to bring back firing squads as a means of entertainment. “Fo...
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@mayor.nyc.govOct 8, 2026, 11:10 PMReposted by @junlper.beer

This afternoon in Marble Hill, a New Yorker was shot by an ICE agent in a residential neighborhood. Early reports indicate agents surrounded him and a 5-year-old child in his car before firing multiple rounds. We believe the child was physically unharmed.

This is an unconscionable and incredibly serious situation. I have called the President; when we speak I will demand that he ends all ICE enforcement actions in our city. I will not stand by while ICE agents terrorize our communities.

Our thoughts are with the injured New Yorker and his family tonight. We are praying for his recovery.

Get ICE out of our neighborhoods. Get ICE out of our hospitals. Get ICE off our streets. Get ICE away from our children.

Abolish ICE.
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@junlper.beerOct 8, 2026, 7:49 PM

well this is why its imperiative to implement stricter sanctions on israel and nationwide BDS because we’re all complicit until we punish them for the genocide they’re committing our government is aiding

@junlper.beerOct 8, 2026, 7:46 PM

yes absolutely

@junlper.beerOct 8, 2026, 6:11 PM

just missing the mark by a slim 20 billion

@junlper.beerOct 8, 2026, 5:31 PM

i should have said that everyone in the IDF is complicit in genocide. obviously nowhere close at all to what i actually said

@theonion.comOct 8, 2026, 5:29 PM PinnedReposted by @junlper.beer

The new revolution in democracy has arrived. Play The Onion Voting Simulator 3D

Now available here: theonion.com/voting-simul...

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@bencollins.bsky.socialOct 8, 2026, 4:42 PMReposted by @junlper.beer

The Onion has torn the Ted Lasso subreddit asunder.


Jacameza
•
11h ago
Love the Onion usually, but they have one Ted Lasso joke and it's reduced to 'people who like it are adult babies'. So much to make fun of about it and they only really found that one angle and stuck with it


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u/save_the_wee_turtles avatar
save_the_wee_turtles
•
6h ago
To be fair....most of this sub sounds like adult babies
@junlper.beerOct 8, 2026, 4:05 PM

truly amazing how stupid the average rightwinger is and how stupid someone like JD vance has to pretend to be to appeal to their base. there's just absolutely no way someone like JD vance doesn't know what socialism is lol

@junlper.beerOct 8, 2026, 2:42 PM

no one has yelled at me or told me to apologize

@junlper.beerOct 8, 2026, 2:40 PM

bsky.app/profile/junl...

@junlper.beerOct 8, 2026, 2:36 PM

i take this back, fully retract it, and i apologize for how i phrased this. i posted this while angry at the constant barrage of years of my life witnessing senseless murder in palestine, and this is no way to express my opinion, which is an end to all conflinct in the region. i’m sorry

@junlper.beerOct 8, 2026, 2:16 PM

putting “raising my child” in the catagory of ways how ai will streamline my life

@junlper.beerOct 7, 2026, 10:18 PM

free palestine

@straycatalyst.bsky.socialOct 7, 2026, 3:01 AMReposted by @junlper.beer

Thank you @theonion.com for gracing the 99% of Seattle! I supped on popcorn chicken and the tasty 0.01% cocktail

I got a million Onionbux!

A million dollar Onion bill stacked on a Sickos keychain and special edition The Onion Inequality edition paper
@junlper.beerOct 7, 2026, 5:28 AM

oh thats fine i don't think anyone needed that money anyways

Trump does not plan to reimburse taxpayers for promotional ads
@junlper.beerOct 6, 2026, 7:34 PM

i think the coolest part about the final page of the mr beast book is how clear it is that they have zero respect for themselves or their readers

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