He deserves all the accolades, but maybe because he’s not a stand up he doesn’t have the prominence he deserves. Apologies if this isn’t his joke, but my contention that he’s a genius stands.

A very good joke which I think was on a recent Beef and Dairy Network Podcast: the local police have a cosy crime department. I hope I have this right, in which case it’s probably a joke written by Benjamin Partridge who is a comedy genius.

To fill the empty evenings when Celebrity Traitors isn’t on the BBC should screen reenactments of key scenes performed by amateur dramatics groups.

:)

My mate once came out with the word insinuendo which I thought was genius

My brother described a warm padded coat as “bumfy“ and it made perfect sense.

My son, a bit older than that, came up with 'precautious' as a verb. I quite like that.

My son when about five once conflated “important appointment” into “impointment” which I think should be a word.

Fife has ‘jamp’ which is the past tense of jump and I adopted that from the first time I heard it. glorious.

We use a'bdy (awbuddy) at work instead of everyone. Usually with an expansive gesture. Not sure if it's Scots, Borders or NHS but I've adopted it with glee.

"Anyonedy" is one that comes into my brain sometimes

My brother, when very little, coined the term “misappeared”, which we liked and continued to use in our family for years.

A friend of mine will often merge "clumsy" and "cumbersome" into "clumbersome" and I've stopped correcting him because it's actually a good word.

Look, it’s too hard for most people to remember, in the moment, whether they mean sliver (small slice) or slither (slide) so I propose amalgamating the two from now on and using ‘slivther’ for both. Or perhaps ‘slithver’, I can’t remember.

If you use REALART10 you’ll get 10% OFF (if you’ve been looking at buying a calendar)

treat your body like a data center. consume as much water, art and literature as possible. upset local municipalities with your existence.

You call him a Minotaur, I call him Half Man, Half Brisket x

One of the nice things about Celebrity Traitors is how easily and without fuss absolutely everyone uses Bella Ramsey’s they/them pronouns. See how easy it is not to be an asshole?

Dear tv and radio producers. Thankyou for the invitation. But, no, I do not want to appear on your show to defend the idea that I am English, after 50 years of living and working here, because the increasingly feral right want to turn this into a "debate" and you cannot see how you're being played