As someone whose child pooped their pants twice in the middle of the night I would LIKE THOSE SECRETS

The graying hair is hot. Always is.

It wasn’t slander! It was making the same yikes face as Alexis.

Just clicked a link to a story and this was my browser. We don’t have to live like this.

I used my phone’s flashlight to look for my phone last week.

It’s my wife’s favorite movie of the Halloween series. Definitely captured the convergence of the OG slasher with the 90s.

“Some of” doing a lot of work there, Mike!

He was basically Barry Bonds for 2 years then decided he wanted to play a different position and no one questioned it. It’s like if Patrick Mahomes came back in 2024 and said “hey I’m going to be a kicker now” and everyone just let it go.

If the sports media had any onions at all someone would ask the Dodgers if Shohei Ohtani’s little pitching vanity project was worth tanking the entire team’s chance at another championship.

I’m sorry but if you’re a Jamaican drug lord whose last name is “Coke” you cannot have a nickname. Not defending Diddy here but he was right to say something.

Cloudy. 53°. Feels like 44°. Look outside and you can’t tell if it’s 8am, noon, or 4pm. This is October in the Midwest.

The Great Danton:

You’re acting like my post is weird but your post looks unhinged bro

I like my magician warm and open just like my bagels.

She set foot in cisalpine gaul today. That was her choice!

My nemesis has crossed the rubicon.

We are just here for the 7 minute songs and screaming vocals that sound like a 75 yr old man whose Buick slipped off the jack and fell on him while he’s adjusting the spoiler.

We had one of those at Iowa a few years ago on the basketball team. He was 7’1” but had arms the same length as mine.