Ahh, the eternal question: Do I put "Trained Clown" at the end of the "Key skills and experience" bit of my CV

I can complete the first level of Sonic 2 in under sixty seconds, including getting an extra life, blindfolded and using my feet.

Put the chairs up to vacuum, forgot, walked back in and jump scared myself thinking we had a poltergeist.

ohhh, I see it

...uh oh

corrrrrrrrr

(This is a thread about not using generative AI)

So I wrote that big mad sort of poem, and sat for a while chuckling to myself. Reading it out loud. Enjoying it. Now it's a completely different thing! And much funnier! Having that friction - that clumsy solution to a problem which then required more work - led me to something new and unexpected.

Initially, the joke of the poster was just "from the people who brought you the CRT wristwatch." You know. How that would be a worrying way to advertise a brain interface device. But having to cover the ipad like that meant I had to write a load of extremely silly shit to fill the space.

Now, this isn't High Art. It's a poster for a tube station in a tiny game jam game. BUT. I was rubbish at photoshop. None of my attempts to get the newspaper looked right. Hence the "fuck it, cover it with a big white rectangle".

Been making tube posters for a game set in the 2000s. One was for a 'neurolink'. I found a good stock photo, but the guy was holding an ipad. Tried to shop that out & replace it with a newspaper. Didn’t work. Decided to cover the ipad with a big white rectangle and fill it with side effect warnings:

Interviewer: Can you explain this gap in your CV? Applicant, who is a character from a Hideo Kojima game: This is Job Gapsman, he's an expert in Computational Vertices, or CVs. To EXAMINE a CV, press the Triangle button.

I like to think I did my bit for this by strongly suggesting that my autism assessors read it. Also you should read it. Yeah, you. AND the audiobook version is splendid if you cannot be arsed to read a book and want to have a chuckle while you are eg washing the dishes or driving to Alton Towers.

ALPHA INFLUENCER (has rabies): i'm not "afraid" of water ok, it's not a phobia, understand? i refuse ok, unlike most people, to let water scare me. "but without water i'll die!" says who? Dasani? stop being Evian's bitch! see this? healthy male mouths naturally produce a nutritious, hydrating foam

Ahaha holy christ (I am on my way)

Ominous!

I solve a cryptic each day on twitch to an audience of 30-50 oddballs, if that counts? (Have also set a couple, but lord, who hasn't?)

You might be able to pull it off (fnarr) by usb transfer? Good luck!

I have! I downloaded my amazon library a while ago. Just a case of getting calibre, a drm-removal plug-in I can't remember the name of, and then sticking your kindle serial number into calibre so the drm stripper can work!